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Quotes #33 by Alpner Quotes #33 by Alpner
Quotes #33 | “Today I got angry, threw my Nokia phone at a wall and watched as it smashed into a million pieces. The phone’s fine though.”

After a couple "off" weeks I'm back with a new Quotes. I got an order from a friend for more then a hundred new stickers with funny quotes on it. I changed the background, font and size from previous design. Since I got many complains how "this sh*t doesn't belong here on DA" I probably won't upload all of them, but I will post a link where you can see them...

New collection:
DA: [link]
Facebook: [link]

The old "finished" collection
DA: [link]
Facebook: [link]

About the quotes:
1.) I don't own any of the quotes in my collection (unless it's stated otherwise);
2.) Credit is given if the ORIGINAL author of the quote is known;
3.) Even if they are racist, sexist, etc. there is no offense intended; They are made strictly with entertaining purposes;
4.) I don't own any (copyrights), so you can use them however you want them;
5.) Possibly there are some grammar mistakes and it would be much appreciated, if you notice them, to let me know, so I can fix them asap;
Add a Comment:
 
:iconrachelthepessimist:
rachelthepessimist Featured By Owner Mar 15, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
They're pretty indestructible. This is great.
Reply
:icontsuk1y4m4:
Tsuk1y4m4 Featured By Owner Nov 15, 2013
I threw my Nokia at the wall when it didn't work properly, aside from the slight dent in the wall everything else was perfectly fine.
You could kill a person with a Nokia if you drop it out the window.  lol
Reply
:icondidi-dias:
DiDi-dias Featured By Owner Jun 13, 2013  Hobbyist Artist
Omg
Reply
:iconshadow696:
Shadow696 Featured By Owner May 20, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
LOL. The same thing happened to me for real!
Reply
:iconkit-day-3:
Kit-day-3 Featured By Owner May 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
That poor wall...
Reply
:iconblackstormwarrior:
blackstormwarrior Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2013  Student General Artist
Oh my gosh that one took me forever XD That's funny!
Reply
:iconshadowrx:
ShadowRx Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
funny how devices that were once so fragile are now nearly bulletproof...
Reply
:iconkalisty-memzic:
Kalisty-MeMzic Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013  Student Artist
yep
Reply
:iconskyvelvet:
SkyVelvet Featured By Owner Jan 21, 2013
so true :D love urQuowts, made me laugh alot :3
Reply
:icondalover26:
DALover26 Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Took me a minute there! XD
Reply
:iconokaminoriley:
okaminoriley Featured By Owner Jan 17, 2013
This is one of my favorite quotes you've posted, not gonna lie.
Reply
:iconballwon1:
ballwon1 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2013
IT BELONGS!!!
Reply
:iconoutlire:
outlire Featured By Owner Dec 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Ha ha! Funny!
Reply
:iconmadmaninthebox:
MadManInTheBox Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
As an owner of a Nokia, I can attest to the quote's legibility.
Reply
:iconmaxterandkiwiking:
MaxterandKiwiKing Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I wish my nintendo was that durable.
Reply
:iconaspaciana:
Aspaciana Featured By Owner May 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Why not all expensive stuff?
Reply
:iconmaxterandkiwiking:
MaxterandKiwiKing Featured By Owner May 21, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I don't have the money to buy it, duh!!!
Reply
:iconaspaciana:
Aspaciana Featured By Owner May 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
No I mean, that all the expensive you already have is just as durable.
Reply
:iconaurora-celest:
aurora-celest Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
I expected this to be some emo shit about the OP was like the Nokia: seemingly unbreakable, but they were secretly broken, but this was actually funny. ^__^
Reply
:icondisneydamsel98:
disneydamsel98 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
hey i don't get it pleese explain this to me????
Reply
:iconthe-dark-side-cookie:
Basically the Nokia phone is super durable, so the *wall* was the thing that smashed to pieces, not the phone.
Reply
:icondisneydamsel98:
disneydamsel98 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
OHH thnx! lol makes sense now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
:iconthe-dark-side-cookie:
You're welcome!
Reply
:iconamelie-fall-in-love:
Amelie-fall-in-love Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
Cool!
Reply
:icontyler43464:
tyler43464 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
hahahha thats great
Reply
:icongodzillakrueger:
GodzillaKrueger Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
:rofl:
Reply
:iconderroflcopter:
Derroflcopter Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
It's funny how vague pronouns can be, you never know if they're refering to the former or the latter. I wonder if there is a language that makes such a distinguishment.
Reply
:iconjiibee:
JiiBee Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Aa, good ol' Nokia 3310<3 I still have one in a pretty good shape, I bet it'd work fine if I only had a fitting SIM card for it : D Tho' my bro claims it's battery is broken… I dunno if that's the case, might be salvageable if it is.
Reply
:iconvioletspirit:
violetspirit Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
I like your posts, they are funny and fresh.
I have entered your facebook page intending to Like it to recieve your posts on my wall, but I didn't, and here is why:
1. I saw there plenty of other posts that have nothing to do with the quotes you posting, and that I'm not interested in.
2. You add several quotes at once, which make them appear as "Alpner.com added 5 photos to the album Quotes." and then there are little photos of them, which you need to click separetly to watch - frustrating and not comftrable.

So, here are 3 tips for your facebook page, that - I assure you - will make everyone want to Like it:
1. I strongly recommend openning NEW page only for the quotes.
2. Post ONLY quotes pictures.
3. DON'T create an album for quotes - post them straight on the page wall - they will appear totaly different.
3. Add only ONE quote at a time. Give us the opportunity to appreciate it and give it propare respect.
4. Don't flood the page. 4 posts per day, with couple of hours difference between each, is the maximum amount!

If you will follow those advices precisely - I assure you that in a couple of months, your page will have hunderds, maybe thousends of followers.
Because your quotes are good, they just need to be handled correctly.

Good luck!
Reply
:icondantesmith:
DanteSmith Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
This must take a lot of creativity on your part.
Reply
:iconbattle-for-the-sun:
Battle-for-the-Sun Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2012   Photographer
:iconthumbsupplz:
Reply
:iconasparticus:
Asparticus Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Professional Filmographer
:iconfblikeplz:
Reply
:iconjuliekrizan:
JulieKrizan Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student Digital Artist
:lol:
Reply
:iconaurora-celest:
aurora-celest Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
:iconjokerplz:
Reply
:iconjuliekrizan:
JulieKrizan Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student Digital Artist
:icontrollfaceplz:
Reply
:iconaryie:
Aryie Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
I've set mine on fire before (accident) and it still works. XD
Reply
:iconchloeclik:
ChloeClik Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student General Artist
This is so funny!
Reply
:iconinsaneymaney:
Insaneymaney Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
LOL
Reply
:iconcakesalie:
Cakesalie Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student General Artist
Omg, first thing I see in the morning XDDD Thank you for making my morning a bit more awesome, haha
Reply
:iconrecklessrob:
RecklessRob Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
Oooohh, wait, i get it! Hahaha, good one actually :p
Reply
:icongonfreecss100:
GonFreecss100 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
LOL TRUE STORY :icontruestoryplz:
Reply
:iconepicmanphilip:
EpicManPhilip Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
True story. :D
Reply
:iconsasukedeidara:
SasukeDeidara Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
I've destroyed a Nokia.
Reply
:iconbluezaoldyeck22:
BlueZaoldyeck22 Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student General Artist
watch out, we've got a badass over here...
Reply
:iconsasukedeidara:
SasukeDeidara Featured By Owner Dec 28, 2012
No, I am only a warrior.
Reply
:iconkenderbard:
kenderbard Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Artist
I love these. :)
Reply
:iconjanmohammad:
JanMohammad Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Student General Artist
It Doesnt hold good with Lumia range :D
Reply
:iconanimatedmusicdrawer:
AnimatedMusicDrawer Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012
Magnificent. I've read the other quotes, but this was the first one I've seen, so I felt like I had to comment on this one. But again, magnificent, this was hilarious.
Reply
:icondew00trulz:
dew00trulz Featured By Owner Dec 27, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
throw a nokia 3310 and see what happens.
Reply
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